Total Bummer

This morning I drove through Starbucks to get my morning coffee. After the employee handed me my drink he kind of looked at me funny and said, "You remind me of someone!" This is always kind of an exciting thing to hear, because you always expect the best. "Who is it?" he thought. "Um....um....OH YEAH! FRED DURST!" My heart sank.

Quick back story for those that weren't there/haven't heard about it: When a bunch of us went to go see Nikki Glaser and Doug Benson a while back, we were the first ones there and ended up sitting right in front. I had my hat on backward and was enjoying Doug's awesome set when all of a sudden he called me out. "Glad to see Fred Durst is in the audience tonight," he joked. I then made the mistake of looking behind me. He thought that was funny and kept referencing my presence the entire night. It sucked.

"Ah man!" I groaned.
"What, isn't that him?" the guy asked.
"You mean the guy from Limp Bizkit?"
"Yeah!"
"That sucks dude, that guy's a tool!"

He just laughed and I drove away. I'm sure he didn't mean it as an insult and he obviously didn't know my history of being likened to Fred Durst, but it was a crappy way to start the day. Not that I really care—at least it makes for a funny story. But, here's a tip for everyone out there: Don't tell people they look like assbag celebrities. Telling a woman they look like Heidi Klum? That's fine. Telling them they look like Janet Reno...not so much.